In a Rut

I feel a vent coming on, but the one I'm writing now is not the one I've been wanting to write for over a week now. 

I want to blog. I really do. And when I'm not online, I have ideas on what I want to write about. 

But really, do I have anything new to say? 

I'm still on my little "holiday" (although I drew a blank when my FIL asked me if I still were over the weekend -- somehow, stopping needed pain meds just isn't fulfilling my mental soundtrack of Madonna's song Holiday. :-), but it just means I'm hurting more and have less energy, and being even less productive. 

I've seen both my internist and my rheumatologist since that post, and both said that while there's nothing unsafe about my little break from pain meds and Adderall (which I take off-label for fatigue), they didn't think the levels and frequency I was taking them at were likely to be the cause of my headaches (which haven't improved, either). That was somewhat encouraging -- I'm a little paranoid about taking these meds that can be addictive when abused. But also a little depressing when my rheumatologist said flat out that he'd "be surprised" if I didn't end up needing to resume pain meds (due to my pain levels that they haven't figured out a different way to treat since I'm prone to gastric ulcers from every variety of NSAID out there). 

The good news is my internist says that the Mayo Clinic website is being ultra conservative at saying it would take six months to be sure I'm not having rebound headaches. She says that with the drug type and low levels I was taking for pain that she believes that eight weeks would be more than sufficient to determine if the headaches are rebound ones. 

That's about all the news I have. I'll try to get the post I've been struggling with written and posted soon. Thanks for reading, and please consider leaving me a comment to let me know how you're doing too, ok?