Here We Go Again ... (Warning: Whining Ahead :)

I hadn't wanted to say anything about in case I jinxed myself, but I was internally celebrating that I seemed to have missed my annual flare, which typically hits me in February or March.

I guess this year, my flare was just running late. Kind of like spring here in Portland this year. Because I'm definitely flared to the point that I'm canceling my volunteer shift at the school library (I made it once in the past four weeks) and even, occasionally my acupuncture sessions. Sigh.

Scott and Ellie competed last weekend in Auburn, Washington, and I stayed home hoping that I'd be feeling better by the time they got back. I think I was actually doing worse by the time they got home than when they left. :-(

Here's the thing, though -- I've wondered if it's actually a flare or if it's side effects from the digoxin prescription I started a month ago in hopes that it would make my heart rhythm more regular and possibly even slow down my heart rate. My PCP had suggested that slowing my heart rate might even help lessen my intense chronic fatigue.

Well, so far, I've had a slight lessening in the frequency and duration of my arrhythmia, but my tachycardia hasn't slowed down a bit. My fatigue levels are soaring, my pain levels are up, essentially all the various symptoms I typically have are worse than my most recent level of normal.

I read the side effects for digoxin, and wonder how I'd tell the difference between my typical flares and the drug's side effects: fatigue, malaise, weakness, dizziness, apathy, tachycardia. On the upside, I seem to have the one side effect I always hope for: I've lost my appetite. I'm hoping that translates into some weight loss, but I'm not holding my breath.

The weirdest part? My stuff is sometimes manageable when I'm immobile. Sitting on the couch, I start to think I'm doing OK (other than the sensation the room is spinning around me). But once I get up and move, I feel like I can't get enough oxygen and I'm short of breath, even though my lungs are clear. I feel like I'm breathing through a straw. And my chest hurts, which has to be costochondritis reminding me it hasn't gone away. Oh, and gravity -- what's up with the gravity lately? I feel like I'm on Jupiter or something.

Ah well, life goes on.

To end on a happier note, here's a photo of Ellie from the skate competition:

That's Ellie front and center. The three girls are waiting for their cues to start.

Thanks for listening/reading.