What On Earth Was I Thinking??!

It was Halloween, and Ellie chose one of her fairy princess outfits to wear for trick-or-treating. And she's just so cute as she flaps her arms (and says flapflapflapflap) and insists that she's flying. She's just irrestible.

And of course, she was very excited about trick-or-treating.

Scott was going to take her to Washington Square Mall, where she wouldn't have to wear a coat over her cute costume and where we wouldn't have to worry about the candy she received being tampered with by a crazy.

And I just couldn't resist, so I went too.

It sounded like a good idea. We parked in handicapped parking, as close to the door as you could get. And I walked with them for the first few stores and then found a chair to sit in and wait for them while they did more trick-or-treating.

Scott and I had walkie-talkies, so when he told me they were getting close to me but one aisle over, I got up to go look for them. Unfortunately, that part of the mall had fewer seats and all of them were taken.

We had talked about having dinner in the food court, but I knew I couldn't face the long lines, so we headed for home and stopped at Subway for semi-healthy sandwiches.

When we got home, we walked next door to visit Auntie Joan. I thought I could manage that because we'd go inside and I'd collapse on a chair while Ellie showed off her pretty fairy costume and Joan made a fuss over her. Instead, Andy was very sick and Joan didn't look completely healthy either, so we stood on the porch for longer than we should have before going home.

Scott was ready to go visit the other neighbors we're friendly with, but by that point I knew I'd crossed the line somewhere along the way and I needed to lie down.

I couldn't even make it up the stairs from the garage without stopping to sit down twice. By the time I got to the kitchen, Scott and Ellie were already upstairs for Ellie's nightly bath, so I climbed another flight of stairs and collapsed in bed.

I spent most of Thursday in bed too, only venturing out when hunger finally won out over exhaustion and pain. I'm a little better today, but still far worse than I was the day before Halloween. I'm definitely not bouncing back from the excursion.

I knew I shouldn't go to the mall, but Ellie was only ever going to have one Halloween when she was 2. Last year, she didn't understand what was going on and was afraid of the people who wanted to put things in her Disney Princess basket. This year, she was great at holding it out with a big smile, although she still had to be prompted to say "Trick Or Treat" and thank you. (And usually whispered them so the people handing out candy couldn't really hear ...)

So, what was I thinking? I guess I was thinking that I love my daughter and I'm tired of feeling like I'm on the fringes of her life.

But honestly, I'm not sure I would have gone if I'd realized that I was still going to be feeling so bad two days later ...

On the other hand, she was so happy when I said I was coming too. And maybe overexerting myself and paying the price for it is worth it to make a little girl so happy.