Monday, November 26, 2007

I Don't Like Mondays!

Who was it that did that song in the '80s called something like "I don't like Mondays"? Was it the Boomtown Rats?

I remember getting the album (Remember when there were albums, not CDs or downloads?) and thinking that should be the national anthem of teenagers.

But you know, it still works for me in some ways.

Not all that long ago, I used to long for weekends. In my working days, it meant time to relax and hangout and do something fun. In my SAHM days, it meant that Scott would be around to give me a break from being the primary caretaker all day long and maybe I'd get a chance to do something fun like quilt.

Now I hate weekends, and I feel guilty about it because it makes me feel like a bad mom and wife. And I spend all day on Mondays trying to recover from the weekend, when I feel the need to get up earlier than my body craves and be more active of a parent and spouse.

I guess it's the chronic fatigue aspect of this illness that's the real issue for me, more than the pain. (Although I suspect the pain would be the primary issue once I got rid of the fatigue ... and even with the fatigue, sometimes it's a tossup which is worse.)

So on weekends, even if I don't actually do much, I get more and more exhausted just being around and interacting verbally with Ellie. It sounds so silly, but I literally do get tired just watching her bounce all over the place and be a typical almost-3-year-old.

So while Mondays are an improvement, in a sense, because I'm home alone and can rest and try to build more energy for the following days, I also hate them because I always feel lousy on Mondays. Sometimes even worse than I did on Sunday because Monday is like an aggregate of the entire weekend plus the end of the previous week when I tried to get whatever needed doing done because I know I'll be out of commission until at least Tuesday.

Four more days, and NaBloPoMo will be over and I can go back to blogging when I have something worth saying instead of trying to come up with something that might be worth reading each and every day. :) Thanks to those of you bearing with me through all of this!

No comments: